Ole Hickory

Dad was inspecting Ed's pecan orchard one day when he noticed a fox squirrel approaching. The varmit crawled to within a couple of inches of Dad's boot so Dad just naturally said, "Howdy".

Well, that must have suited the tree rodent cause it proceeded to crawl up Dad's overalls until it was sitting on his shoulder. Dad didn't know whether to slap it off or just wait to see what happened next. He wasn't particularly busy that morn so he decided to just see how things would flow?

Dad pulled a couple of paper shell Mahans from his Dickey's bib pocket, cracked 'em, and offered his new friend some sustenance. This sealed the "bond" so Dad eased over to his pickup and treated the hickory nut harvester to his first road trip.

Hell, riding around just suited the furry shotgun rider so much that Dad opted to offer him a "bed and breakfast" deal at Gene's Wright City beans and taters emporium.

Dad and his woodland companion rocked along for several days as they no doubt shared endless thoughts on philosophy, wimmen folk, and other esoteric mysteries. (Mostly the squirrel developed a nicotine addiction due to the constant fog created by unfiltered Camels being consumed.)

Sadly, Dad's little buddy eventually fell under the devil's curse of "drink" after a daily regimen of sharing Budweiser laced with a dash of rim salt. During one such brew sojourn, ole Hickory decided to crawl around on Dad til he wore his welcome out. For reasons unexplained, Dad picked up a wooden clothes pin laying nearby and put it on the offending parties bushy tail.

What happened next is still hard to believe? That puppy was hit with a pure bolt of motivation as it began to circumnavigate the room at a blur, knocking down everything in its path. Pictures hit the floor and busted. Lamps fell to the side. Curtains got plumb shredded. All the while we was hunkered down with our hands covering our heads wonderin' if Armageddon had done been unleashed in furry minuscule form?

Well sir, the clothes pin eventually fell off and Hickory calmed a mite, but that started him looking down the barrel of exit. Seems he tended to be nocturnal, meaning he "rummaged" around in the house at night. Dad finally put him outside and bid him farewell.

Hickory hung around in the pecan tree by the living room window for a few days. It was obvious he was trying to suck some smoke from them Camels through the screen into his nicotine starved lungs. Ever once in a while, I swear it looked like he was making a paw motion like using a salt shaker to plead for one more ration of Bud?

All such things eventually end and so it was with this visitor as he moved on for other adventure.

I will always wondered what kind of tall tales he told his buddies over the years about his week living with Gene in Wright City?