JURASIC PARK

Friday me and the bride went to the ATM to get some cash.

While waiting in line with my driver side window down, something wacked me in the leg and fell in the floor.

I immediately thought that someone had thrown something in the lowered window as a "slight" and therefore reacted somewhat "aggressively" (well, cursed, etc., like folks that have been cops for near 40 years are prone to do?)

Didn't see anyone around, but as no one was behind me in the ATM drive thru, I got out to see what was in the floor.

Ya know them "chamilion" lizards that can turn from brown to green? Yep, had one in the floor board of the Tahoe that was obviously some kind of flying superhero????

Nope, couldn't catch it as it fled into the duct work of the A/C, dash, whatever.

We was enroute to the airport for the bride to fly to Lubbock (and she rode the rest of the ground trip with her legs in the seat terrified that the "KILLER" lizard would appear and devour her????????

Left bride at the airport, came home, and ran my hands everwhere I could under the dash to "flush" out Mr. LIZARD. No luck

Not a big deal, except said bride drives Tahoe to work M-F and know that if senor reptile "crawls" up her "laig" in traffic", he will either drown from the excessive urination, or dear bride will knock down adjacent buildings while "mashin" on the accelerator and the brake simultaneously???????????

Bride gets home today with youngest daughter and me and the adventurous child start an intensive safari in the Tahoe.

Sharp eyed daughter (who has no fear of anything on earth!) spies Mr. KILLER LIZARD in the side pocket of the passenger front door. (Now we have a plan of attack)

Dad gives daughter the flashlight and moves in for the stealthy capture with his (arthritic, swollen, old butt hands) and stabs into the side pocket.

Now see the SUPER CHARGED (scared butt) LIZARD jump onto the brave daughter's pant leg.

Now see the "brave"?????????? daughter start dancing the St. Vidas Day Jig (Gene Waller phrase and have no clue what it means???). Now see the brave, fearless daughter shakin her leg like a vampire was bout to sink its teeth as the ubiquitous assassin lizard monster traverses his killing path North (up her leg!).

Then the (bastard) lizard jumps from the frenetic daughter's leg BACK INTO THE DAMNABLE TAHOE?>!!!!!!!!!!!!!

About now, the ole ranch hand is ready to bring out the heavy artillery and "just start blasting", but the calm (leg, shaking, brave???????????) daughter suggest another "catch" attempt.

Ole fat butt, gray, Dad takes another stab, semi-grabs the varmit, and manages to cause it to leap outside the Tahoe.

Score: Lizard: 1 Country folks: o